Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Losing the Ponds

In the epic science fiction television show Doctor Who the main character (called The Doctor) travels through space and time with the help of his trusted companion. The companions change occasionally. They get killed, The Doctor abandons them, they chose to leave choose, their memories are wiped, or they are otherwise disposed of, but the Doctor's companions never stay forever. I knew this about the show long ago, but I have a small emotional stress about it every time The Doctor changes companions.

My boyfriend and I both enjoy this television show so we re-watched a few old episodes for fun. Eventually, though, I told him I wasn't up to date on the newest season because I know the current companions, The Ponds, are going to not be on the show anymore. I don't know exactly how it happens, but I know which episode it occurs in and I've been avoiding watching the series to avoid that moment where there is no more content with some of my favorite characters. We got into a large debate about the logic of this. He was arguing that they had already been eliminated from the series and I was living in an unnecessary state of unease about a competed event. I was arguing the point that it was fine because as long as I didn't experience the loss of these characters they were alive in my imagination and I could keep them existing forever. We couldn't agree on that, but we did agree that "forever is an incorrect concept" (as John Green proposed) not only because the sun will explode and the universe will die a cold death when it expands to the point where nothing is interacting, but also because time probably exists outside human observation of its passing. With that I decided I could watch because I didn't have forever to do it.

It makes me think about the way I put off sad or difficult things in general. Any time I have to disappoint someone I can't write them an email or call them up and let them know. It would almost certainly be better if I did it earlier, but I never would be able to logic my way out of it. We're trained to avoid pain and it's so challenging to make yourself do stressful things that we don't do them. I hope in the future I can look at this and remember that sometimes The Ponds are already dead.

No comments: