Today before class I was sitting silently staring at a book when the beautiful girl sitting next to me with her curly hair, nice outfit, and confident smile (I don't know her name) leans over and asks, "are you really only a sophomore?"
I laughed and answered "Yes?"
She then informed me "You seem really put together. Just like, you always have your shit together. Most girls I know who are sophomores don't have that. You get straight As right?"
Now I am freaking out and blushing. She's making my day, but I'm not really used to such a direct question, "Well yeah, but, well that's not good. I don't want to be obnoxious," I respond.
She continues "No. You just kind of exude that. Not like you brag or anything. It's just kind of obvious," She finishes and sits back in her chair.
I have no idea why this girl thought it was necessary to tell me this, nor do I know if its exactly true, but it was a perfect, random moment. As the saying goes, (I heard it from Jeff Grubb, game designer, world-builder extraordinaire, and author at ArenaNet) "Everyone is the hero of their own story," so obviously I think I am pretty fantastic. I suffer from ego justification just as thoroughly as everyone else and believe I usually have my life going pretty swimmingly, but to have a complete outside observer lean over to me and say you are doing all right was better than hearing it from my entire family and my closest friends all at once. I sometimes miss events or do a mediocre job on assignments, but I am doing acceptable overall this semester considering I am only a sophomore.
The thing about it is, the emotion I believe I exude is non-stress. Whether I am as fully prepared for something as I would like to be or not, I simply have chosen not to worry about it. It's not really as important as most of my classmates make it out to be. You can only imagine if you have never been to college the amount of times I hear, "I'll die if I don't do well on this" to which I laugh. I work exceedingly hard, but it's simply not as important to me as health, life, or family. A lot of sophomores miss this I think.
To finally offer an anecdote to illustrate my point, last night I was dancing in the dining hall with a friend when the girl turned to me and said, "Don't you have homework?"
I causually responded, "Yup. I have to read a Shakespearian play by tomorrow. It was assigned yesterday. Don't worry. It'll get read."
She said, "Passive voice much? You have to read it." Needless to say, the play got read, I got eight hours of sleep, and this girl was thinking about homework while I was dancing. I like my way better. It's not perfect because sometimes I make errors, but I am generally praised as having "shit together." Sorry for the bad language, not for the attitude.